Tuesday, January 7, 2014

For 2014...

I try to avoid new year goals and resolutions just because I fear failure, or forgetfulness, or another little box to check off on the never-ending list of don't forgets. This year, though, it is the year of the horse, which is kinda like having a little super mario mushroom boost when it comes to the year's success, right? ;)
So, as it were, I was thinking about my 2014 goal, resolution, word o' the year, blah blah blah, and I just wasn't quite sure. I suppose I needed a good push, so when our pastor brought it up last Sunday, I took it as a kick in the bum, and I was off the cliff with only a parachute of a 2014 goal to keep me alive. 

It actually took me less than a minute to find the word i was looking for. I strive to be the best always. I want the best for my husband, for my kids, for my family. Sometimes it's a great thing. If i died today, my family would know how much I love them. They'd know that I cherished each and every moment with them, even when I was mad, sad, or hurting. I make sacrifices in life to ensure that we are together. I constantly remind them how special our family is, how important it is that we face this world not alone, but with God above and each other below. That life comes along and isn't always kind or fair, but we will always have the unconditional love of each other. But sometimes it causes me to be less than I want to be. I don't like it when Emma doesn't feel like helping Evan get the heavy milk gallon out of the fridge. I don't like it when Evan whines about going grocery shopping with us. I don't like it when a bad day at work is brought home. But no one does really. Am I right? But it's normal to have siblings who don't want to be a caretaker, and a male who doesn't like to shop, and a human that can't always every day leave work at work. Heck, I myself can't even do that! So I really, really hate it when I find myself breaking someone down for being less than perfect. Don't get me wrong, I don't do it every time, but lets face the facts here. I'm Mom. Hear me nag. 
I have a degree in family relations & childhood development. I've taught school for decades. I KNOW that positive reinforcement works, and for the most part - I'm freakin awesome at it (hear my horn a-blowin'??), but I'd like to be better. 
I want to be the one that they run to when they feel sad or down or had a bad day to get a good dose of happy pill without thinking for a second that maybe I just may tell them what they're *not* doing right. 
I wanna be perfect.
(of course)
But I'm a child of God, and I'll never be perfect down here, so I know I'll make mistakes and fall off the wagon and let people down and steal candy when the kids are at school, but I'm gonna be all that AND I'm gonna be the wife and mother that is working on becoming better.
So my 2014 theme is based on Ephesians 4:29 

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear

In a word...

So this year, I'm gonna take an extra breath before I react and remember that even criticism and truth can be delivered in an encouraging way. (climbing up my soap box) We are growing up in a world that breaks us down with every commecial, every magazine, news story, tweet, post, and feed. We're too fat, too out of shape, my boobs are too small, I'm feeding my kids non-organic poison food, my husband got cancer from drinking the BPA water bottles I bought for him, we're too poor for the Joneses, we're too rich to understand, we're sinners for having the wrong beliefs and for not treating people outside my religion as wrong, a child of divorce will be divorced, my kids will grow up to be gay because I do construction on my house and my husband occasionally cooks. The list goes on and on. Stupid things people say that mean nothing, but can break you down just a bit each time. I'm gonna keep this house safe! I want my loved ones to walk up and grab the door handle and say "BASE!" and all the people and words chasing us have to stay away and wait.

I'm taking a stand for my family. Protect this house, I will!


Drink the kool-aid with me?

Totally unrelated photo - the Lego Castros on their New Year ski trip. 

Happy 2014, everyone!
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